Where'd All the Manly Men Go?

I am dating a sissy. That's right; I said it: A Sissy. I do not say this lightly. I happen to love a man who can talk about his feelings and who enjoys art and maybe a little theatre from time to time. But this guy is not that kind of sissy. He doesn't read, and he hates art and sports for that matter. To make matters worse, he also has no friends. He is the kind of sissy who calls me more than he needs to and gets pissy if he feels that I don't call him enough.

Where is it written that to be in a relationship you have to give up having a life? I have certainly had my days of co-dependency, but I like to think I have grown up since then. I like to go out with the girls and have a beer, talk about our conquests, call the boy toy up for a little swaction (sweet action for those of you who don't know), and move on with my day. It's fine to call me, but I'm not looking to settle down here. I find it weird that he is so eager to settle down with me. And the thing is, if I was a man, this would be completely normal, but since I'm not, I'm the bitch. I should make more time for him. I should re-arrange my whole schedule to suit his neediness.

Right now, I am battling a cold, and he basically told me that if I don't come over tomorrow, he is coming over to see me. Period. I find this irritating. I have a lot of homework due tomorrow by midnight. In addition, I am a bad sick person, and I would very much like to lie on my couch and whine. He will only distract me from this project.

I guess what I really want to know is, what happened to all the manly men? I would love to find the kind of man who would come around, sweep me off my feet once a week, and then go out with the boys on the other nights. I would love to find the kind of man who just wanted to play around for awhile and see what came next. I would love to go on casual dates and see a movie or have dinner here and there. I would love to find a man who didn't whine and cry and piss and moan every time I said I was too busy to see him right this minute. What happened to those men? And do you have to sacrifice class if you find them? For example, the manly man I dated previously had a plastic bull's balls replica hanging from his pick-up truck hitch. Say it with me boys and girls: Mistake.

I guess that in the end, I don't want a guy to throw himself at me, and I wonder how and when it all got so serious. I miss the days when I could go to the movies with a guy, and it didn't automatically mean that I wanted to buy a split level together and have his babies. I wish I had the balls to say "If I'm playing it cool, you play it cool, too. Don't throw yourself at me; it makes you look desperate." I would like to do a little chasing for a change, too.